War No More
by Tarafae
Summary: Even as Britain withdraws its troops from the colonies, France and Spain declare war. In the midst of all this, Bartimaeus and Kitty discover that Nathaniel still lives. Worse, he's prisoner of Jane Farrar. And she's determined to take over London.
1. One

**AN: REVISED 10/13/14**

_Bartimaeus_

A thick, heavy, gray mist swept through the room. In the midst of it an inhuman screech was heard, like that of a bird, but harsher and shriller. The flickering flames of candles faltered and disappeared at the sound of it. A hulking figure stepped out of the mist, becoming more visible as the mist faded away. It had a bull's horned head, a human's torso, a faun's legs. A Minotaur.

What? It had been hard enough to get to my destination in the first place. Two summons came almost simultaneously, but one had been a split second the leader.

The mist was still hanging in the room, though fading away; it gave me time to think. One of them had obviously been Kitty's; she had promised to summon me after a few hours of recuperating in the Other Place. But I had still been careful in materializing. If the first summoning had been another's, it wouldn't do to appear in Ptolemy's form, would it?

On the other hand, who was the other summoner? Kitty was the only one alive* who knew about my existence (probably.) The only other possibility was _him_, but he was dead, wasn't he?

|*I say alive because...oh, read on.|

The mist had dissipated. It was show time.

The first thing I noticed was the figure opposite from me in the other pentacle. I instantly recognized her face. The first (and last) time I had seen it was through a fuzzy haze when I was...oh, never mind that. I knew who she was, even if my memory of her was blurry. All I knew was that my ex-master had been rather fond of her.

It was Jane Farrar, most likely the last magician in England left who could control an over-5000-year-old djinni like myself. Who had been presumed dead, by the way.

Speaking of England, where were we?

It didn't look like London, as I flicked my glance over to the window on my right; rolling hills of green and an empty blue sky with a few houses dotting the landscape was definitely not London. It was the only window in the room. The rest of the room was bare except for the usual summoning things* and...

|*Which, in case you're interested, consisted of chalk, herbs, candles, some iron ankhs, a shelf overstuffed with summoning material, and things like that. |

Oh dear.

Behind the woman standing in the pentacle was a chair. And in that chair...

I recognized him despite the fact that I couldn't see his face.

Even though he was tied up (which did give me a bit of respite) with his head hanging limply, hair grown long* and draped over his face, and a grinning third-plane** foliot^ perched on his shoulder, I still knew his shape. It was hard not to, when I had previously been inside him^^.

|*It had been precisely 240 days since I last saw him, and hair _grows_, of course. At least on humans.

**I have access to seven planes, all co-existing and overlapping. Most organisms can only see the first plane; cats, the first two; and spirits the others. Things are hidden on the earlier planes, but must be revealed somewhere along the line.

^There are many kinds of spirits, broken down into five main types, from lowest to highest: imps, foliots, djinn (like myself), afrits, and marids.

^^In a rather disturbing episode which I would rather not repeat. |

Him who had been presumed and recorded dead. Him who had been the "demon" of my life, as I had been of his.

Nathaniel, aliased John Mandrake.

I wondered if he had told Farrar his true name. As far as I knew, other than himself, Kitty and I were the only ones who knew that piece of information.

Speaking of Farrar...I focused on her once more. She was looking at me rather impatiently, even though all those observations I just had had taken less than two minutes. "I see you have noticed him," she said rather coolly, instead of the usual magician gabbling of "You must obey my will."

The Minotaur glared. Obviously she had either moved him there or he had been there already. Whatever the case, he had been put there to perturb me. And though I wouldn't admit it, it had.

"What is your will?" I asked drily with a deep Minotaur-appropriate voice. Get it over with already.

Farrar smiled. "If I am correct, your sole master for these past months has been the ever-famous Kitty Jones, has she not?"

I ransacked my never-empty supply of lies and came up with "No. I haven't even had a master."*

|*This was more for Kitty's sake than for Nathaniel's; I wouldn't really _willingly_ do anything for him. However, he was/had been Kitty's friend, and we still had a – though rather fragile – bond from...oh, forget it.|

The person in the pentacle opposite from mine went on as if she had asked a rhetorical question*. "Then you should be perfectly aware of her current location. My will is for you to find her."

|*Which she hadn't.|

She hadn't properly dismissed me yet. I waited.

"All this time. Eight months. Almost half of those were spent with the doctor healing him" - I noticed that she only referred to Nathaniel as _him_, not by either of his names - "and the rest were spent finding a proper spirit to find that Jones. Also, as you can imagine, we tried squeezing information out of him, but after six months he had revealed nothing except your name, and only just that at that. But I still tracked you down. And now after you bring Jones here we can give them a proper execution before I conquer London. So go."

First dismissal. Two more before I really had to leave and get Kitty.

Poor Nathaniel. During the six years of my servitude to him he had always been speaking of this – becoming Prime Minister, ruling over all of England as the most powerful magician. And now he was going to die before he got to see it happen by someone else's hand. Of course, with the weakling magicians in Parliament right now, it was an easy task.

"I am giving you an open invitation, much as I distrust you. And now the terms of our contract." Why hadn't she said that _before_ the first dismissal?* She spoke the words and I absentmindedly repeated them, only half paying attention to their actual meaning. Something about protecting her, which no honorary magician would omit**, and some other things about securing Kitty.

|*Flawed reasoning, this one. She always tried so hard to be clever.

**Of course, Kitty and Ptolemy had done away with this, but they were special.|

Second dismissal. I still stayed, resisting the pull.

Farrar looked at me with her icy eyes while nodding in the foliot's direction. Something only a magician could do. The foliot leaned down and pinched Nathaniel, effectively awakening him. His eyelids fluttered open and his head jerked up. I hadn't realized before what a pitiful state he was in. His cheekbones* were hollow and his clothes hung loosely on his frame.

|*On his face, of course.|

He noticed me and relaxed somewhat. "Hello, Bartimaeus," he said in a weary voice.

"Hello..._John_." I almost called him Nathaniel before I remembered that Farrar and the foliot were listening. "Good to see you."

"You too." He made an attempt to smile that fell flat. Poor boy looked like he'd been in a war.

Before we could have any more interesting conversation, Farrar dismissed me. The last thing I saw before I vanished was Nathaniel's face.

So he lived.

**As you can see, I made one or two changes to grammar, tweaked for continuity with the following chapters, and smoothed out some of the more awkward parts. No harm done. **

**Chapter 2 coming shortly!  
><strong>


	2. Two

**AN: REVISED 10/13/14  
><strong>

_Kitty_

Hands trembling, mouth dry, Kitty Jones tried the summons again. And again. Finally, she stepped out of the pentacle. She had summoned Bartimaeus several times before without having any trouble. Why now?

From her studies, she knew there could only be one answer. He was already on Earth, so she couldn't call him. Another magician had summoned him.

Tamping down her growing panic, she tried to calm herself down. Who could it be? Who else would know of Bartimaeus's existence and dare to summon him?

Instantly her thoughts went to Nathaniel. No. He was dead. There was no way he could have survived an explosion of that magnitude. She was only giving herself false hope.

Kitty sighed and belly-flopped onto her bed. Hopefully the magician who had summoned Bartimaeus didn't need much, and she'd be able to resummon him shortly.

Come to think of it, no one ever summoned a djinni like Bartimaeus for just a simple task. Why use the energy, when a foliot or two would suffice?

Kitty turned over on the bed and stared up at the ceiling. She felt that rush of unease working its way into her veins again. In a weak attempt to placate herself, she tried to rationalize her thoughts. So suppose it was Nathaniel summoning the djinni after all, and he had really survived the explosion? Even before that, he had been badly wounded and weak. It may well have been eight months before he had the strength to summon his favorite servant.

But surely he wouldn't have needed that much time to at least send her a message. Something like "I'm not dead, let's have dinner" would have been enough to put her mind at ease.

Kitty frowned. Whether Nathaniel lived or not - and she allowed herself just the faintest glimmer of hope that he did - there was something off about the whole situation. And she had the feeling that she would become involved very soon.

* * *

><p>Later that evening, she heard an uncertain rapping on the door and smiled to herself. "Come in, Bartimaeus."<p>

* * *

><p><strong>AN: I tried to make this longer than it originally was, and I think it is...? Still relatively short, though. There's not much to say from Kitty's POV in this part of the story, unfortunately. <strong>

**In any case, as C'sMelody pointed out, Kitty's thought process was a little choppy in the old version, which is what I aimed to clean up. When I first started _War No More_, for some reason I kept thinking that the trilogy (and consequently this story) took place in the past. Rather silly of me, so I've also fixed some things to make more sense in a modern era. **

**Chapter 3 is revised, but I should get some actual work done on my projects today (lol) so I won't post it until later. **


	3. Three

**Hi guys. New chapter yey! I apologize for such a late update, but life has been cruel and I haven't been able to type much. **

**Then I realized I could handwrite it. XD Silly me. **

**Anyway, I wrote it by hand and then snatched computer time whenever I could. The next two chapters are written, too, and will be up ASAP when I have time to type them. **

**Now to answer reviews. **

**BRILL WILL: Yes, but since all the current magicians knew that Bartimaeus was being used by Kitty…I've inferred from the books that it's an unwritten "magician's law" that you're not supposed to summon a spirit in someone else's charge. Of course, Farrar is rather heartless… You've got a point. I'll have to consider that. **

**MaiWishes: For a long time I had a general plot running in the back of my head. Gradually it took shape and then I discovered FF. My brain went "HOORAYZ" and I started actually writing it out. At first I was writing it as I typed, but then, as I said above, I realized that I could write by hand. I do have a couple scenes planned out. I think the end of the fourth chapter will rather satisfy. I also have a general idea of "where this is going," but I will work out the details as I go. :)**

**Thanks for all the other positive reviews! I am encouraged. **

THREE

_Bartimaeus_

For once, the glorious Bartimaeus of Uruk, N'gorso the Mighty, wasn't sure what to do.

Delay going to Kitty.

Follow your charge.

Protect her – that's your job.

Not anymore.

I shifted my wings uncomfortably*. This new master was not what I had expected.

|*I was in the form of a hawk, flying south. I had oriented myself using a map I filched from a local store back in England, and then demanding that I know where I was. I got more than a few confused stares.|

I felt the familiar pull of the charge and sighed, steering my way towards Egypt.

Being the great djinni I am, I soon arrived at Kitty's hotel. She was sleeping; I had forgotten her habit of napping in the greatest heat of the day.

Obviously the best way to wake her up was to shake her, but she was rather aggressive when violently disturbed from resting.*

|*Let's just say I found this out the hard way.|

However, she was extremely sensitive to noise while asleep. She had insisted I put a sound barrier around her room to keep out the hubbub of the streets.

Because I am so nice, I screeched softly instead of going for the full-blown shriek. Kitty instantly sat up, rubbing her eyes and blinking at me. "Bartimaeus? Is that you?"

The hawk's head elongated and bent back; the legs stretched upward as I morphed into Ptolemy's form. The boy, dressed in shorts and a T-shirt because Kitty hated the traditional loincloth, folded his arms across his chest. "Who else would it be? Do you know another Bartimaeus who knows you?"

This captured her attention, I could tell. "Is it Nathaniel? Is he alright?"

"He's alive." Drat, she sensed I wasn't telling the whole thing; her eyes narrowed.

"Did he send you?"

Well, Farrar hadn't mentioned _telling_ about my charge…

"You know Jane Farrar?" Kitty nodded. "She summoned me to find you…and basically you're dead. She and Nat are the only two powerful magicians in England left, you know, and you're the most influential…er…magic-user. She wants me to bring you to her so she can execute both of you and take control of England."

"I see." Unlike Nathaniel, Kitty wasn't selfish. While I could mostly predict that _he _would sit back and say, "I'm not dying, go away,"* her expression was determined. "Let's go, then."

|*Well, it depended on who the other person was. If it were, say, Sholto Pinn (who, by the way, is living in another country now), he would have said so. But if it were Kitty or possibly _moi_, there was no telling if the sensitivities of his boyhood days would rise to the surface.|

I started to protest this. "I can't _carry_ you all the way back to England, and we don't exactly know for certain there's a flight going there anytime soon…"

"Hush up. Now what town, exactly, are they in?"

"Aleyton. Why?"

"Take my hand. I've been practicing." Her eyes were shut tight.

Oh, the _joy_ of _holding hands_ with a _female human_…*

|*I'm being sarcastic here, can't you tell?|

Anyway, there was a blinding flash of light* and I saw doors on all the planes fly open. It was rather like being summoned. The next thing I knew, we were right in front of an old, faded sign which read " ELCOM TO AL TON;" I took it to mean "Welcome to Aleyton."

|*For humans. Not for me, of course.|

"I must say, I'm impressed. I haven't met many who have the ability to perform the teleportation spell, Kitty – Kitty?"

She had run ahead. "I can't believe one of England's most powerful magicians lives _here!_" she exclaimed, gesturing to the vastness, the openness, the…_exposure-ness_. "Where are Farrar and Nathaniel?"

Kitty had a lot of stamina*. We tramped for a good hour and a half before finally reaching Farrar's house. Kitty squinted at it. "This is…a _magician's house?_"

|*By human standards.|

It was a shabby, dim, two-story, grey, small house. Not exactly a magician's ideal quarters.

I answered, "I'm pretty sure this is it. Wait, I have to change my form. Can't take any risks in case we run into Farrar or her foliot." Ptolemy vanished and was replaced by a hulking, growling black bear with beady eyes and a large, wet nose.

"You look disgusting."

The bear grinned, flashing its sharp canines. "That's the point." With that, it turned, smashed the door open with a massive paw, and bumped smack into Farrar's dutiful foliot in the shape of a housecat.

"Watch it!" the cat meowed angrily, but its expression changed as its eyes traveled up my giant form.

"COWER IN FEAR IN THE PRESCENCE OF THE GREAT DJINNI!" I thundered. The foliot shrieked and ran up the stairs. I offered Kitty the seat it had left vacant, but she refused it.

Farrar descended down the staircase with a grand and haughty air, even more enhanced by the elegant black pantsuit she wore, the foliot trailing in her wake. It scowled and gave me a raspberry when it saw me.

Farrar said, "Well, well, well, Bartimaeus. How nice of you to bring me a guest, and so soon, too! It's evening, dear" – speaking to Kitty – "and I have room in the house. Won't you stay overnight?"

Kitty gave her that rebellious, impertinence-filled smile only she could do*. "You leave no choice, Ms. Farrar."

|*It was kind of like only Nat could give me that thin-lipped smile, only I liked Kitty's smile better. Directed at others, of course.|

Farrar clapped her hands in mock delight. "Ms. Jones! You remember me! How very nice of you! Well, bring her along, Quiscos. You too, Bartimaeus." She headed up the stairs. I rather gingerly gripped Kitty's arm; she shook it off and climbed the stairs after Farrar.

Kitty and I were swiftly herded into Nathaniel's holding room*. I was under strict orders not to escape, not to help either Kitty or Nat escape, refrain from using magic of any sort, and prevent any attempts at magic either of them did. _Magicians_. The door slammed and I sensed a faint vibration as a magical lock was set up over the door.

|*Well, I thought of it that way.|

Nathaniel's thin face was barely visible, due to the small amount of moonlight coming through the non-curtained* window. His eyes were large and out-of-place compared to his gaunt, hard features, but his countenance softened at the sight of Kitty. "I'm not…dreaming, am I?"

|*Another sign of how down-in-the-dumps Farrar's current state was.|

"Unless you dream about the three of us locked in the same room on a regular basis," I said, stepping into the light after transforming into Ptolemy once more. Kitty had dug a pocketknife from – where else? – her pocket, and was cutting at Nathaniel's bonds. I waited patiently for five minutes, sitting on the floor and watching him slowly rub circulation back into his arms.

"So," I said, "how's your life? Mine's been rotten since you 'died.'" I made massive air quotes on the last word. "Sure, Egypt was fun – if reliving Ptolemy's life and death every day was fun, and being dragged around to historical sites was fun. No offense, Kitty." She gave a slight nod.

Nathaniel made a face. "You're as annoying as ever, aren't you? I don't even need to explain my past eight months to you, do I?" I chose not to ask how he knew how much time had passed.

Kitty was now staring at Nathaniel. His normally elegant and refined voice was harsh and had an edge to it*.

|*Just listing facts here. No personal input. General opinion.|

"Nathaniel, are you alright?"

His smile was weak and looked forced. "It depends on your definition of 'alright.' If alright means two small, stale loaves and two glasses of water a day, plus endless interrogation, then yes, I'm alright."

"So what do we do now?" Kitty asked, concern in her voice, yet efficiently changing the topic.

"Well, you two are being executed tomorrow, we're not allowed to escape, and I have no clue what Farrar has planned for me after the execution. I say we just sit and enjoy our last night together." What? It was a logical response.

"But right before she executes us you can help us escape," offered Nathaniel.

"Sorry to put down your reasoning, Natty boy, but first of all: Farrar is either going to order me not to do anything, or she'll dismiss me, or I'll have to execute you myself on her charge. Second, why on earth would I want to rescue _you_? Kitty maybe, but certainly not _you_."

Nathaniel met my gaze steadily. "You're lying. Face it, Bartimaeus; you actually care about me to some extent. At least enough to want to save my life."

"That's what I hate about you magicians!" I exploded. "You're so self-serving, overly cautious about yourself, and everything you do goes hand-in-hand with me-myself-and-I. To save _your_ life – pah!"

Kitty said warningly, "Bartimaeus…"

Curse Nathaniel and his everlasting calmness. He could be so…_cool-minded_ when he wanted to. "If I die, then nobody can stop Farrar from dominating the country, possibly even the world. Aside from Kitty and Ptolemy, I'm the nicest master you've had in a while – at least better than Farrar."

"You _dirty little creep!_ You read my mind while I was in you."

Nathaniel winced visibly. "Let's not go there, Bartimaeus. I would much rather prefer that episode of our crossed paths of life stay not talked about." I huffed but stayed silent.

"Anyway," he continued, "we should prevent Farrar's possible three charges. If we could get her to dismiss you, Kitty or I could re-summon you sometime before the execution. It's a risky plan, but there's a chance."

"And how, exactly, do we convince Farrar that I am worthy of being dismissed?"

"Simple." I wanted to permanently wipe that smug look off his face. "You become, in essence – pardon the pun – your essence."


	4. Four

FOUR

_Nathaniel_

Nathaniel watched Bartimaeus rant, smiling slightly. He had expected an outburst like this, but they had to do _something_.

"_What?_" the djinni screamed, rattling Nathaniel's eardrums. But perhaps that was the actual rattling of the room.

"Do you have any idea how _humiliating_ that would be for me, Bartimaeus of Uruk, Sakhr Al-Jinni, Serpent of Silver Plumes? Even when I'm weak I try to maintain a nice form, something that isn't altogether _embarrassing_." Nathaniel stifled a laugh as he listened to the djinni accidentally reveal that he was weak sometimes.

"You're smiling! Enjoying this, aren't you?" Bartimaeus turned his iron stare onto Nathaniel.

"Admittedly, it's rather amusing to hear a de - _djinni_ acknowledge to its weaknesses." The djinni's face fell; evidently he had not noticed this.

"Well, anyway, it's still so _mortifying!_ The very idea of me making myself my most disregarded form…"

Kitty, who had been listening in silence up to now, spoke up. "Bartimaeus, Nathaniel's right. None of us actually _love_ the idea, but it's our best shot." Nathaniel glanced at her, her determined, adamant figure silhouetted in the moonlight. A strange, foreign flush crept up to his face, but he couldn't imagine why.

"Why should I care about the fate of the human world, anyway?" Bartimaeus demanded.

"_Because_," Nathaniel said placidly, "Farrar will probably overuse you. And you'd never be able to live with the fact that you had indirectly killed us."

"What the-" spluttered the djinni, face becoming an interesting shade of red. "What makes you think you know what makes me uncomfortable?"

"You're soft-hearted, Bartimaeus. Deal with it." In the next instant the air evaporated from his lungs; a very angry djinni had knocked him to the ground and now sat upon his chest.

Bartimaeus's voice was fever pitch. "Don't you _dare_ call me soft-hearted! I'll prove I'm not! I'll do what I haven't done all these years!" Without warning, Bartimaeus was yanked off of Nathaniel; Kitty stepped between the two as Nathaniel scrambled to his feet.

"Stop it. Stop it _right now_. We'll never get any closer to a solution if you two keep bickering like little children. I bet you've woken up Farrar now – I think I hear her in the hallway. Bartimaeus, _do it_."

The djinni's expression contorted to pure rage for a split second, then dissipated to resign. "Fine. But you'd better promise to let me hear the end of it. Never mention this extreme act of kindness again." The tan boy's shape melted into something like dirty water. Nathaniel stared down at the puddle but made no remark.

"What the blazes are you shouting about at eleven in the evening?" Farrar had suddenly thrust open the door. Her gaze traveled downward until it rested on Bartimaeus. "Oh." She stared at the puddle for a long time before speaking at last. "I might as well dismiss him, if he's that weak. Funny, I thought I was stronger. Oh well. I'm still going to make sure you two don't escape in the night."

She first dismissed Bartimaeus. Next, she secured Nathaniel in the chair again. Frowning, she looked around for something to bind up Kitty (so Nathaniel assumed) but found nothing. Farrar turned to rummage around on a shelf and Kitty slipped into the pentacle with barely a sound. Quickly, in a low voice, she recited the incantation to summon Bartimaeus.

Bartimaeus instantly shifted from the form of a whirling wind with some bones drifting through it into Ptolemy's shape.

"Send Ms. Farrar out the door, please?" Kitty asked.

"What?" stammered Farrar, but Bartimaeus was already shoving her out the door into the hallway. He grabbed the doorknob, forcefully pushed the door closed, and put a magical Seal on it.

Nathaniel stammered, "But…but…"

"But what? I got Farrar out, didn't I?"

"It's an iron doorknob!"

"Iron – what?" Bartimaeus jumped back from the door as if he had received an electrical shock. He frowned. "I don't feel any bad auras emanating from it. That's odd."

"Do you think," Kitty began slowly, "that this is something that resulted from when…you know? It might be a bonus for you, and maybe for Nathaniel, too, because the magician and spirit have to have a mutual trust for the relationship to work, and then the aftereffects are beneficial."

To this Bartimaeus replied, "Look, Kitty, I love how you always stop to philosophize, but we can philosophize later. Right now our main concern is getting out of here." He walked over to the window, opened it, both glass and insect screen, and frowned. "Farrar's being too overconfident - either that or she's being absentminded. There are no magical barriers whatsoever."

The dark-skinned boy sprouted wings, airlifted Kitty down first, then came back for Nathaniel. He set the magician down carefully next to Kitty and – was he looking _concerned?_ "You're even lighter than Kitty. What exactly did Farrar _do_ to you?"

"It doesn't matter," Nathaniel said tightly. Memories of his captivity swamped his mind and he tried to rid his thoughts of them. "Where do we go from here?"

"Back to London," Kitty answered. "The word must be spread."

Nathaniel felt weary already at the prospect of such a long journey; London was at the other end of England. "And how, exactly, do we get there?"

Bartimaeus made his wings vanish and took Kitty's hand. "She can teleport. Just take her hand."

"She can _what?_" Nathaniel was incredulous. It took a great deal of effort and concentration to perform the spell.

Kitty snapped at Bartimaeus, "I don't need you to speak for me!" She stretched out toward Nathaniel's hand. He realized his palm was sweaty and hastily wiped it on his pants before gripping her hand firmly. It was warm and hardened from her years on the streets, but there was a certain softness to it. Kitty closed her eyes –

Nathaniel's eyes stung; he blinked, adjusting as the flare of light passed. Street lamps flickered dimly along the narrow lane. He recognized this place.

"We're only a few streets away from my house." He paused. "That is, if the magicians haven't sold it or anything. We can stay there tonight if they haven't."

Kitty's eyes met his, glowing in the faint radiance of the lamps. "They haven't. They were going to sell it, but I think some of them were still hoping you would magically show up one day."

"Then let's go." Nathaniel walked toward the end of the lane with a slight, renewed vigor in his step. He turned to make sure the others were following him, then kept going.

The vigor faded soon, and left Nathaniel exhausted at the end of the walk. He dug a rusty, tarnished key out of his pocket, unlocked the front door, and ushered Bartimaeus and Kitty in. He dragged his feet up the stairs, stopping briefly in front of his study door only to remember that Farrar had made him dismiss all his spirits-in-service while she still had him in her power.

"The guest room is at the end. Kitty can sleep there," Nathaniel announced, gesturing vaguely in the direction. "Bartimaeus, if you need to, I think I can find a folding cot in my closet."

"Sure, sleep in your own bed, and give me the cot," the djinni muttered. However, he added, "I don't need rest. I'll alternate between guarding you two during the night."

"Alright, then." Nathaniel made his way down the hallway to his room, across from the guest one. He entered the bathroom adjoining to his bedroom, rummaged around in the closet, and tossed Kitty a toothbrush; she caught it neatly. "There's a bathroom joined to your room, too," he told her as he saw her out of his room.

In the space between the two doors, Kitty reached out and grasped his hand. "Promise we'll start working on the problem with Farrar tomorrow?"

Nathaniel allowed a tiny smile to enter his face. "Promise." Kitty returned his smile and said good night. Her hand lingered in his for a moment before she withdrew into her room and closed the door.

When Nathaniel had brushed his teeth, Bartimaeus was waiting in his room, sitting on his bed. Too tired to change his clothes or to reprimand Bartimaeus, the magician flopped onto his bed and stared at the ceiling. He heard the djinni's voice sounding from above. "You like her, don't you?"

"Who?"

"Kitty, of course."

"Well, she's a good friend. An ally."

"Stop avoiding the question. I know you have a crush on her."

Nathaniel felt his face and ears burning. "Do not."

"Do too."

"Shut up." Nathaniel rolled over and dragged the pillow over his head, shutting his eyes.

"Don't deny it, Natty boy. You like her."

"Be quiet. I do _not_ have a crush on Kitty." Why on _earth_ was the djinni poking around this topic?

"She likes you too, you know." Nathaniel chose to answer this with silence, but he noticed Bartimaeus's voice lacked its usual teasing tone.

"Can't you leave me alone for once?" He wanted to sleep desperately, before the djinni said anything else.

"Fine. But if you love her, why don't you just tell her?" Bartimaeus got his final two cents in before the magician finally found rest.

**YES Bartimaeus is being annoying again. And this time it really matters to Nathaniel...****But what am I talking about.  
><strong>**REVIEW. **

**MaiWishes: Ahahaha. I hope so...and I lied earlier. I meant chapter 5. Keep your eyes peeled. **

**Thanks to all my other reviewers! Your reviews encourage me and bring smiles to my face.  
><strong>

****EDIT**: I was rereading _Ptolemy's Gate_ today and realized that Kitty told Nathaniel whose form Bartimaeus is always wearing. -gasp- The error is fixed now. **


	5. Five

**Hello, my lovely readers. **

**I'm so sorry I haven't updated this story in FOREVER, but I have many activities keeping me busy (school being at the forefront of them.) Additionally, I'm mainly focusing my writing efforts on my novel (which I'm rewriting for the second time -sigh-), so both my fanfictions have been kind of ignored. Therefore, I'm putting my other fanfiction, Second Life, Cahill Style, on hiatus, and I'll try to update this at least once a month. **

**Without further ado, the chapter you've all been waiting for. **

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><p><span>FIVE<span>

Something prodded his side. A voice drifted into Nathaniel's pounding head. Why did it hurt so much? "…he's not dead, for the millionth time. Next time you ask I will make you dead."

"You can't do that! I am a fourteenth level djinni, Bartimaeus of Uruk-"

"Oh, shut up, Bartimaeus. Remember, I'm still your mistress."

"Master. You're my master. Mistress sounds so…dirty."

A moment of silence ensued. Nathaniel lay motionless, eyes still closed, ignoring the throbbing in his skull. A girl, and a…a demon? No, he's not a demon, he's…

_Oh, right. The djinni is Bartimaeus and the girl is…Kitty._

Suddenly Nathaniel remembered the events of the previous night and immediately wished he hadn't. Stupid Bartimaeus, poking around in a magician's business. He felt a sudden urge to sock the djinni in the face and clenched his fist.

Kitty's hand, which had been lying on the bed next to Nathaniel after poking him, tensed. "Bartimaeus…I think Nathaniel's waking up."

"Well, it's about time, that lazy-boned-" There was a noise that sounded vaguely like a hand being clapped over a mouth.

Nathaniel carefully opened his eyes. "Ow…my head."

Bartimaeus scowled at him. "You sleep in until ten and you don't even say good morning?"

Nathaniel sighed. He didn't have the strength to argue with the djinni today. In fact, every ounce of the little strength he had had last night seemed to be gone. "Bartimaeus, I really don't feel like arguing with you, okay? I'm tired, I can barely move, and my head feels like a bomb went off in it."

"Nathaniel...that doesn't sound too good..." Kitty hovered over him, concern written all over her face.

"I - I think I'll be okay, though." With great effort, he propped himself up into a sitting position. "See? I can sit up."

"Your face has gone all pale, and you're sweating," observed Bartimaeus. "Oh yeah, and your arms are shaking."

"Shut up," growled Nathaniel, trying desperately and failing to steady his trembling muscles. He pushed himself to the edge of his bed and fumbled his feet into their shoes. Mustering his little strength, he put his weight onto one leg, preparing to stand. It wobbled and collapsed, dumping him back onto his bed. It was a small motion, but Kitty was watching him the whole time.

"Nathaniel, I really don't think you should..." She placed a firm hand on his shoulder.

Nathaniel bit his lip fiercely. He would not appear weak in front of Kitty.

_Since when did Kitty's opinion matter to you? _

_It's because she was always the good one! I'm trying to prove that I can be a good person too! _

_By making yourself get up? _

_Yes!_

_Oh, and Bartimaeus's little "talk" with you didn't have anything to do with it? _

Why was he even arguing with himself? Shaking his head, Nathaniel forced himself to his feet. His vision immediately began blurring and he tipped to the right. He would have fallen if a pair of arms hadn't caught him and helped him upright. "Steady there, Natty boy," Bartimaeus's low voice said in his ear.

"I can stand by myself!"

"No, you can't, dumbo. Did Underwood teach you anything about listening to your bodily signals? Or dear Ms. Whitwell? No? Pity. Let me give it to you slow, Nat. You're sick and in no state to be out and about."

To be honest, none of his masters or tutors had taught him much about body functions. He had to find that information out himself from health textbooks.

"I don't! Well, maybe I do. A little. Still, do you want me to let go of you right now?"

"No..."

"Good. Are you sure you want to get out of bed and do all those human things like eating and reading?"

"Quite sure."

"You're an idiot."

"So I'm told."

Bartimaeus sighed. "If I didn't owe you for saving my life -"

"You don't."

"Whatever." Nathaniel found himself slung over the back of the djinni's gargoyle form. Said gargoyle left Nathaniel's bedroom, flew down the hallway, and flipped over the railing of the landing.

A pounding of frantic footsteps followed them. "Bartimaeus!" Kitty shouted from the top of the stairs, gripping the railing and leaning over it. "That's dangerous."

"You don't say," mumbled Nathaniel. The sudden drop had left his stomach roiling and his head dizzy. Very dizzy.

The djinni poked him a few times, making him wince. Bartimaeus called up to Kitty, "Nat's fine. A bit dizzy and nauseous, to be sure. No real harm done."

Nathaniel groaned and sat down on the bottom step, his hands falling limply to his sides. "Bartimaeus?"

"Yes, O former master?"

"Don't do that again."

Bartimaeus pursed his lips, now back in his regular boy form. "Do you not like flying?"

"I've never liked flying."

"Oh? Is that why your face turns such lovely shades of green whenever you fly?"

"Yes, Bartimaeus."

"All right. I'll try to remember that in the future. Now, off to breakfast!"

"Bartimaeus, don't tell me you're going to flyyyyyyyy! Eep!"

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><p>"I think Kitty likes it when you 'eep.'"<p>

"Be quiet, Bartimaeus."

"It is pretty cute, I admit..."

"Bartimaeus."

"After all, it's not every day that the great and mighty magician John Mandrake 'eeps' like a kid."

"Bartimaeus. Shut. Up."

"It's not my fault you 'eep' every time you fly!"

"I can't focus, Bartimaeus..."

"Oh, hurrah! I've disrupted your concentration!"

Nathaniel groaned and buried his face into the pages of the book. He was trying to do research on corrupt magicians, but his head was still a mess and Bartimaeus wasn't helping it at all.

Although, technically speaking, all magicians were corrupt...

"So, Nat, what have you found so far?" Sitting cross-legged on top of Nathaniel's desk, the djinni placed his palms on the wood and leaned forward.

"Nothing you don't know already." Nathaniel edged away from him slightly.

Bartimaeus beamed, shoving his face even farther into Nathaniel's. "Being a five-thousand-year-old djinni really pays off sometimes! You learn so many things."

Nathaniel scowled and raised his hands to push the djinni's fake head to a safe distance away. "Apparently, personal space is not one of them."

Bartimaeus looked miffed. "Personal space doesn't apply to a shapeshifting djinni!"

Nathaniel groaned and pressed his fingers into his aching temples. "Bartimaeus, can you shapeshift yourself somewhere else?"

The djinni blew him a raspberry but kept quiet. Nathaniel leafed through the pages, glad for a respite from the constant nagging._ Tyler Freeman...Miller Fuller...William Gladstone..._

William Gladstone? Gladstone, the hero of Nathaniel's magician life, was in an index of corrupted magicians?

He hurried to check the author of the book. On the solid purple cover were three initials in black: C.T.M. He opened to the author's note.

_...C.T.M stands for Commoners' Truth of Magicians. We are a group of people dedicated to finding the truth about magicians, not just what they tell us. In this book..._

Nathaniel frowned and ran a hand through his hair, trying to remember why he had purchased this book in the first place. Surely his magician self would have arrested the vendors on the spot.

Clarity came. He hadn't bought it at all, but had been resting on a park bench when he saw the book lying on the pavement. Intrigued by the title, he had taken it home but never gotten around to reading it.

Now he was glad the book had been forgotten. Otherwise, he might not have this valuable asset. Turning the pages to the section about William Gladstone, he began to read.

_While William Gladstone is one of the most well-respected British magicians of all time, few know just how corrupt he was. Because he had such great magical power, he was able to bribe many into helping him climb to the top._

_But perhaps the most shocking fact is this: In one of Gladstone's recently discovered journals (carefully hidden by the government, of course), he writes about his experiments in summoning spirits from the Other Place and absorbing their powers. Since our resources are limited, we cannot prove the credibility of this statement. However, if it is true, then it certainly would explain why Gladstone was so hard to defeat..._

Nathaniel shut the book, already throbbing head now spinning. William Gladstone, whom he had admired for so long, had possibly been tormenting spirits to gain power? A few years ago he might not have thought much of it, but now he felt nauseous. Did Gladstone really not deserve his power? It was stolen, wasn't it?

Power. Why were magicians always after power? Was there simply something in that process of concealing one's true self that brought greed to the top?

"Lots of questions?" Nathaniel picked his head up out of his hands and realized that Bartimaeus was staring at him (and probably had been for the last ten minutes.) Ptolemy's form had his head tilted slightly, brows creased in a rare display of concern. Yet it hadn't been the djinni who had spoken...

"Nathaniel, are you all right?" Kitty's hand dropped gently onto his shoulder. He felt the tips of her hair brush against his skin lightly where his neck met his shoulder; a faint tingle ran down his spine, but not out of fear or dismay.

A sudden wave of pulsing agony washed through his mind, dizzying him. Nathaniel slumped against his desk. Dimly he heard Kitty and Bartimaeus's shouts of alarm before all faded into a colorless void.

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><p><strong>LAAAA! And there is the end of the chapter. I'll try to update as soon as possible, but in the meantime...reviews? <strong>


	6. In Which I Explain A Thing

AKA: FF author disappears off the face of the earth for close to two years and must tell why.

Hey guys!

First of all, thanks for the overwhelming amount of support I've gotten on _War No More_. When I first wrote and posted this as a young, unlearned author all those years ago, I never expected that this small story in a small fandom would get so much notice. And I do apologize, as I realize it's been almost two years since I updated.

So first of all, where the hell have I been? Of course, being an author of the non-adult sort, I'm still in school. Also, I kind of lost inspiration along the way. But I have read through all the reviews (and I will reply to most of them via PM once this explanation is up) and it's very encouraging. Nowadays I'm even busier than I was before (I'm in a specialized school for math, science, and engineering, so I get an extra class and more homework than the average student – fun times). However, I need to thank Dick Grayson for his lovely review that inspired me to come out of hiding and tell you what's been going on. Yes, I am alive and well, just busy and very, very tired.

Never fear – despite the load that's on my plate, I will continue writing this story. As an older (and hopefully better) writer, I might make some minor revisions to the existing chapters. And I'm probably going to make changes to the plotline as a whole. I have to take some time to think it over and figure out what the endgame is (which I never really had planned in the first place, lol). I can't make any promises, but I will do my best to get at least one chapter out by the end of the month. So yes, that means I don't have a chapter right this minute, and I'm terribly sorry that you all got notifications saying I updated when it's really just a very long author's note.

As a side note, Squirrel Singer is a rather childish penname that I made when I was still a newbling to the Internet (I'm not lying – I didn't really experience the Internet until 2012), and it rather embarrasses me. So I'm probably going to change my account itself…just a warning in case you get confused when you get a notification saying "XX has updated their story" and you wonder who it is.

Once again, thanks for your support, and thanks for just being here and actually liking my story. You go, you.


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